What to do..what to do..

So many different things to think about. Should I stay, or should I go. If it was just about figuring if I should go be with Kash, vs not being with Kash, the answer would be simple, and easily found. However, there are more things involved. More risks to be taken. I'm hearing so many opinions on why I shouldn't go, and why I should. On my family's side, I'm hearing stay. You don't know his family, yada yada. They don't want me to wind up like I had all the many times before then be stranded with out a place to stay.

On Kash's side, I'm hearing come (go) and that would be the best. While I can see both sides, I'm still unsure. And not being able to talk to Ann is just making this worse. I still have yet to receive any of what she supposedly sent for the pets. I'm worried I'm gonna have to take Dona to the pound, because I can't afford to take her to the lady to have her adopted out. I'll be lucky if I can give her money to foster the cats. I'll never forgive Ann if I lose my babies. My best friends. *Sigh* I need more opinions. And from those that aren't part of the situation, directly.

I want to talk to Molly but it seems I just can't get myself to really open up. I'm just so blah. Kris wants me with Kash, however, she isn't sure if I should just go like that. Much like the rest of my family, she would hate to see something go horribly wrong and my ass be stuck on the streets in a state where I know no one but Kash and his family. Aside from my ex fiance, and let's not go there. Ok? Okay.. yeah. I talked to Josh not too long ago, however a lot of things have changed since we talked.

A lot of options once opened, have been shut before I could even pass through the door. New options have arived and so far they've stuck in place. From what I can tell, going to GA would be best for all now, and for Kash and my futures. Despite when I get there things will be slow, but that's to be expected. But so many things that are great, IF they stick. I guess I just need some moral support. Someone who would support the decisions I, we, Kash and I, make. I know my family doesn't. Because of that, it's just hard on me I guess.

But when have they really supported me, completely? Not yet. Maybe in time.. after certain things happen.. maybe they'll finally see. Who knows. I hope though. I can hope, right? Dream? What's living with out dreams? I'm tired of living with my dreams, it's time I start living my dreams. Damn it. Yeah, okay. I'm fucking really tired. I need to sleep. Wow. Peace out world.

-Khai