Craving social advances, I find myself unable to find a medium, with in myself, to look externally for nourishment. I find myself needing to blog, but unable to, for many a reasons. One of them being I, like I said, can't find a medium, and completely opening myself up through blogger, is not something I find I can do much anymore. Aside from every day normal things, and happenings.
Like Kash, I just can't find a place where I feel, free. Aside from with him, in the solitude of our home. Being me, though, I need more of a social life. Not social like I want to go out and party, but I need something. Others. I miss having at minimum, ten different people I could talk to at any given moment of the day. Now, I stay signed out of messengers, finding myself, not feeling as if I can open up to anyone, who are even on my messenger lists.
Kash and I even deleted our messenger programs, only signing on to them, occasionally through email, or meebo. We deleted our plurks, I rarely use twitter, except to reply to a few people, on the rare occasion I sign in on there. Like now, I've been staring at this thing for 10 minutes, but not able to get a damn thing out, that I want to say. Its like I'm stuck, but where, I'm not sure.
Kash, I love you. Very much. Muah. Anamchara. <3
-Khai
I completely understand, and you know this, and we'll find our medium. We'll talk in person, no need to type it all out here. i love you too, soulmate.
ReplyDeleteI know it can be hard not to have anyone to talk to, and I know that I havent entirely regained favor with you, but I just want you to know that I am here, and willing to talk any time you want.
ReplyDelete