'I see you in my dreams..' 'That's because I visit you as often as I can.'

I was in my room, and my room was the living room. Not this house. I lived with my gma, and my brother was going to be moving in too. My mom lived there too. But I had turned the living room area into a kick ass pad for my bro and I.. when all these people started coming over. Friends/family? Or something. Both. My gma was making some food, and I remember that catfish was the main ingredient. Wtf. Anyway. I said I wouldn't be eating.

These girls were there, not sisters to each other, but close? They were the daughters of a couple of my mothers friends? I don't know. They were probably 15-17. Here I am 24. It was weird, my mom wanted me to entertain them. Um, no? I wanted to just go back to my room and listen to my music, and talk to Kash. Because yes, Kash was a reality in my dream. Sometimes he isn't, depending on the actual dream.

My mom had also said that my uncle Mike and aunt Lyleanne were coming over for dinner. I am guessing it was in honor of the new place? I don't know. My brother hadn't moved in yet, but I had made his place for his bed. The room was dark, and always would be with out really opening the blinds and or putting lights on. Which is just the way I like it. There was a food and water dish, for my cats, along with a litter box in the room.

Clothes rack..etc. I didn't even notice that it was the living room until I remembered my mom had said that she hoped Mike and Lyleanne didn't go to the front door, and went to the side doorn instead. Because all the sudden I see Mike and Lyleanne's shadows through the window/front door. I go over to it and try to open it. Before I opened it, I was noticing the numbers on the door. So many numbers, but only some were big.

4138 I think was the number. But I was reading it backwards. I remember a 5, but it was small, one of the smaller numbers just around the larger ones. A wooden door, a screen door in front of that. I opened the big door and told my aunt, that this was my room, lol and that she could come in through the side. And she said nah, she'd want to see my room anyway. Mike had gone to the side. As she stepped through, she said that my ex-wife had been hanging around outside.

I was like, you're kidding..right.. But I just laughed it off. However, I looked outside and saw a truck, and I immediately saw Merci in the back seat. My heart literally lept out my chest and I ran outside. But they had started to drive off. I didn't care, I ran after them, trying my hardest to find them. Finally, I saw them in this parking lot down the way. I had no idea where I was, but it didn't matter. I saw both Merci and Grace getting out of the car.

Then, I saw -her- and I also saw Fareed. >.> Now, that wasn't something I expected. Yet, at the same time I guess I wasn't surprised. I'll just call my ex Azra, for this entry. It's close enough. I asked what was going on, why she was there..etc. And she started to explain to me about how Natasha's grandmother had kidnapped her, and they were going to be taking her up into the mountains, so that Azra couldn't see her any longer, or be able to be near her.

Natasha being Azra's eldest daughter.. not really relevant. I just kept thinking, well Karma's a bitch. She took my girls from me, her eldest gets taken from her. All the while, we were walking back to my house. I didn't even know where my house was. Azra handed me a paper. Some sort of contract? Deal? I never could figure it out. She wanted me to keep the girls for sometime? While she could sort out the mess with Natasha?

And I said okay, no problem. I was moving to GA, and the girls would be closer to them, since they are in FL. But then when she found out I was moving in with Kash..yeah. She started to recant.. and I started crying, because I really wanted my girls. Needed them. I said how I dream of them just about every night, and that's when Merci said 'I see you in my dreams daddy,' followed by 'I see you in my dreams too daddy,' by Grace.

I just looked at them and told them 'That's because I visit you as often as I can, I miss you both soo much.' They said they missed me too, and I said 'I love you girls,' they said 'I love you too daddy' and that's when I realized we were dreaming... and once I became aware of the dream I looked around and said 'I don't know where I am. Where I live.' and then someone said 'hey, there's Molly, she's waving down that street.' I looked behind and saw we had only passed two streets, when I passed three to get where I had, and then looked back at Molly one street up.

She was on the street where I lived. Where she came, I have no idea. But yeah.. Then I woke up. I miss my girls more than anything in the world. It was to the point in the dream, I was almost willing to give up my future with Kash, or rather, post pone it, so that I could look after the girls until their mom took them back away from me. That's how much I miss and need my girls. *Sigh* I don't want Kash to take offense to that, but I just knew, I wouldn't have another chance with them.. and I knew Azra would be taking them back soon.

I just want my daughters. If I could have them right now, I would. I wish by some miracle, something happens, and they are brought back to me. Even better they are brought back to me, with out any conditions. I can live my life, and we all can be happy. With them there, smiling and laughing and not having any worries in the world. Such beautiful girls, no girl is or will ever be as beautiful as my Merci and Grace. -The pic is one of the only I have left. Azra deleted all pics and vids I had of them from my laptop as a going away present.-

-Khai